Like Me: Finding Strength in the Smallest Gifts

  Me with my Teddy Ruxpin.  Pretty much the best gift ever.  It is not what my title is referring to, but look how bad ass I look!

 

 

At times in our lives we all face adversity.  It could be because of our race, gender, sexuality, or even our socioeconomic status.  I was reminded of this last Saturday as I went through a training session to volunteer at the Like Me Lighthouse.  The Like Me Lighthouse was started by country music singer Chely Wright who grew up near Kansas City and has come out as the first openly gay country singer.  The Lighthouse strives to be one thing above all: A safe place for LGBTQ youth. 

 

The center provides resources many resources, including a full library and connections to support groups and agencies in the KC area.  I chose to volunteer not because I’m a trained counselor or expert, but because I want to be there to listen and to be visible.  The center also houses a direct line to the Trevor Project hotline which provides 24/7 counseling support to youth contemplating suicide.  The trainer during my session told us that the Trevor Project’s data showed that more phone calls were made to the hotline in the state of Missouri than any other state in the nation.  This disgust and scares me at the same time and I have a feeling Kansas is not far behind Missouri in the number of calls. 

 

 

We have all faced adversity, yet we also have had people and moments in our lives that help us rise up against it.  One of my biggest pieces of  inspiration stems from one of the simplest gifts I ever received: a high school graduation card.  The card was from my dad’s cousin Teddy Gregory.  Teddy was a very special guy.  He was born with polio and although he could have been a bitter and cynical human being, he was the total opposite.  Teddy was the epitome of kindness and self-determination.  He may have been in a wheelchair, but that didn’t stop him from having a full and rewarding life. Teddy passed away a few years ago and was loved and admired by many people.  In the card him and his wife Eileen gave me for my high school graduation in 2003, he wrote this simple sentence:

 

 “Your Grandpa bragged about all of his 9 grandchildren, but he always said you were different and special and that he knew you were going to change the world.”

 

I still get that card out and read it when I have one of "those days".  The days when I feel like I serve no purpose or the days I feel like the world is working against me.  My main mission in life is to lead by example. I’m a true believer that equality will not happen when it comes to gay rights, until more of us are vocal and present in society. Anderson Cooper said recently in his now infamous email: 

 

“I’ve also been reminded recently that while as a society we are moving toward greater inclusion and equality for all people, the tide of history only advances when people make themselves fully visible.” 

 

I want my story to be a constant example to those parents who refuse to speak to their son or daughter after they come out, remember my story, my face, and how happy I am and how much I am loved and supported by my family and friends.  Also, I want my story to be a glimmer of hope for that kid who grows up in a small town and feels like he/she can’t relate to anyone around them.  It doesn’t only get better; it’s like Christmas morning every day.  Be brave, be strong, and above all, be you.

 

So my hope is that you all find that passion and you all find that one thing that you want to make better in the world.  No matter how small the difference you think you are making, you could be changing the world for hundreds.  Find your inspiration, find your strength, and lead by example.  I hope to lead by example with what both my grandfather and cousin Teddy taught me about compassion, hard work, and pure humility.

 

If the shoe fits, you are changing the world in your own little way, and I know that I am.

 

-R